A lot of people confuse networking for the excuse we give the boss to sneak out early and have a beer with our friends or play a round of golf on a Thursday afternoon.

Networking can be these things; however, it is much more effective if we approach events with the clear mindset of networking. Understanding what we can and cannot do will help immensely when we are building a network. A network is people who know people. The person you talk to may not be your next customer, partner, employee, or anything else. But their friends very well could be. This is not about selling your service or product to everyone, it is about selling yourself. Making them remember you the next time someone needs your particular service or product.

1. Relax and have fun

People network to meet pleasant people and talk about business and other things as well. If you can relax and have fun, you become much more pleasant to be around and that will be its own reward.

2. Present who you really are.

Networking is more about building connections and friendship than sales. You are creating a connection that is going to be built on trust, How often do you give someone you don’t trust a reference?

3. Don’t spread yourself too thin.

Many people make the mistake of passing out 300 business cards. The smart networker works in small groups, getting a chance to remember who he or she meets and deals with. If you are looking for coverage, nail flyers all over town. If you throw your cards around - others throw them away.

I make much more business from a networking event where I focus on a small group and make them really feel that I care about their business and that I want to help them.

4. Talk to people, Don’t sell

People participate in networking events because it is a low pressure social environment. By all means be proud of what you and your business can do. But don’t make every conversation about how they should buy what you are peddling. It rarely works, and it gets really annoying to most. Remember, you are here to get them to sell you to their networks, not to get them to buy right this second.

5. Learn the introduction trick

It’s easier to have a conversation when you are being introduced to another person. Learn this trick yourself and you will quickly build another skill. “Bill! This is Jacqueline, Jackie is an accountant…. Bill owns a printing business” A sentence like that will accomplish more than you think.

1. Bill and Jackie both think you’re a really nice person to have around.
2, You just repeated everyone’s name to yourself. Which will help you remember it later - and knowing their name next time you see them is a huge bonus.

6. Notes and Bathrooms

I use the bathroom break to pull out a notepad and make quick notes on paper. If you don’t have impeccable memory, find a way to do the same. You will probably have a stack of business cards that you don’t know what to do with if you miss out on ways to remind yourself. People tell you valuable information about themselves, and you will do great if you can remember it somehow. Finding a way to take notes also helps you remember that Bill just got married, and Bob just got divorced. One little fact that you REALLY don’t want to mix up in conversation later.

7. Give Referrals

Networking is not there for you to get people to work for you, it’s an exchange. Pay close attention to what you are hearing. You probably know someone who needs what the people you meet can offer. If you give referrals, you get referrals.

8. Act Quickly on Referrals

When someone gives you a referral, be swift to follow up on it. You are missing a great point in the whole process if you don’t. When they give a referral, they are putting their name in hock for you. If you don’t contact the person, they end up feeling, and maybe even looking stupid. You will also never get another referral from them. If you move quickly, and the person they referred you to is happy, they end up looking good instead, and will give you more referrals simply because most people like looking good.

9. Give freely

There is something amazing about value. If someone is having a problem that falls inside your realm of expertise, give them a solution if you can. By giving them something they value for free, you stand a great chance of them returning as a paying customer later. A free piece of advice can get you a lot of paying business in the long run.

10. Stay in touch

When you meet someone that you think can help you, or you can help. Make sure you get in touch and stay in touch. Ask them to meet and share ideas.

Maybe it will be over a beer or playing a round of golf on a Thursday afternoon.